Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Changing Your "Spots"


I am loveable and deserve love!

It's often said "a leopard cannot change his spots" when someone believes he cannot change.

This saying goes all the way back to the bible: "Can the Ethiopian change his skin or the leopard his spots?"(Jeremiah 13:23)

I used to think that being a fat chick was who I was. Fat was me. My obesity was my leopard spots. I truly believed it was impossible for me to be healthy - I'm fat, I have always been fat -so why even try!!

Most people fail at weight loss because they can't change their spots. They go back to their old ways.

The truth is you can change your spots - but only after you believe you can!

Not a dream. Not a hope. Not a wish.

You really need to believe it is real... like those movies around Christmas time!!

Weight loss is more a mental process than a physical one. Your willpower and self-control, and self-esteem are key to your success.

You need to get your mind in shape before you can get your body in shape!

Are you battling depression or self-loathing? Get that taken care of first or you are setting yourself up for failure!

Losing weight isn't a magic bullet that will fix your life. You are loveable and deserve love right now - you don't need to lose weight for that! Do it for your health, that is the only reason that works.


Shyla said...

Great thoughts.

I think we all have to figure out what is keeping us fat. It's very complex. In your case, being big was part of your identity. For myself it's been different. In MY mind's eye, I sort of think of myself as slightly SMALLER than what I really am. Occasionally I'll catch a reflection of myself in the computer screen when it's off and black, sitting in my recliner, and I think "So that's what I look like to everyone." Something has been keeping me fat and in my old habits. I think it's subconscious self-sabotage. I remember about four years ago, I got back down to 204 from an all-time high of 225, and there I was again - close to the 100s, like I used to be! At that point, there was NO excuse for me NOT to get myself below 200 again. Five pounds away, no problem, right? So what did I do? I ballooned again, back up to about 220. Something deep inside wouldn't allow it. I'm journaling to try and figure it out. It's a little different for everyone.

Another one of my downfalls is fast food. I regularly order it a few times a week. Every other day, at least. The last thing I ordered was a 10-inch meat lover's pizza from a local place on July 22, 2009. I decided That was it. I was giving it up, for the most part. I will still have my occasional "cheat days." I decided once a month, if want to. According to the movie Supersize Me (if remember correctly), once a month is the max for fast food, if you're going to eat it at all. I came so close TONIGHT to ordering out. I almost called up and ordered a french dip and onion rings from one of my favorite places. Now they're closed, so I can't. (Haha..thank God.) But I came here for inspiration again, and found a new blog from you! yay

I have to figure out what is going to make this weight loss different than every other time I've ever lost weight. I think in the past, I've always had short-term visualization. I would only visualize reaching a certain weight. I never envisioned what my life would be after that. This time I'm really trying to imagine my life years from now. It's a total lifestyle change. I also have to let go of the idea that I can ever "eat normally." I think that's how I delude myself into fast food stops so often. "Well, all these other people eat it and look fine..." Food is my addiction. I'm always going to have to monitor myself. No matter what the day, what the occasion. If I'm going to keep my weight in check, even on holidays, I have to be aware of what I'm eating and how much.

A lot to absorb. I'm still in the beginning stages of making small changes. Right now I'm just trying to drink the minimum amount of water, get in some fruit and veggies everyday (because there were plenty days I'd have none, unless it was a slice of tomato on a Whopper), and lay off the fast food/restaurant food for now. That's another mistake from the past. Going from no exercise and junk food, to a major exercise and diet plan the next day. Nobody is going to stick with that. Small changes. I will add a small amount of exercise slowly in another week or so.

Joanna said...

I am just starting out on my weight loss journey I have only 20 lbs to lose so not as much as you did on your amazing journey any advice would be greatly appreciated



Memphis Mandy said...

Just like to say Jessica, your blog has become a major inspiration to me. I e-mailed you about 2 weeks ago and since then I have lost 8 pounds by just cutting down on how much I eat, drinking tons of water and walking everyday with a pedometer. I even started my own weight loss blog http://memphismandy.blogspot.com/ I am so "changing my spots" once and for all! Thank you for the inspiration!

tina said...

Jessica thanks for the blog entry, what you say is very true and I think so many in this struggle with weight can identify. I check your blog every now and then and find it very inspiring.

Shyla - I could have written the exact same entry that you just wrote - literally - all of it. I too have this visual image of myself that is actually smaller - not larger. It makes it all the more horrifying to catch a glimpse of myself in the reflection of a store window - or the worst - in a photo. I can't believe what I see sometimes - don't want to believe it - so sometimes I just ignore it. It's easier - to pretend it isn't a big deal or that it doesn't bother me - but the truth is that it is ALWAYS on my mind. I wonder if I counted up the number of times in a day that I have some worry over my weight or appearance and how it has a negative impact on my life - how many times would it be?

In April i signed up for Calorie King. I kind of went into overdrive and burnt myself out rather quickly. I was counting everything I ate - I was cooking everything at home (except my lunches which I bought the frozen smart ones or lean cuisine), I was either walking or exercising 6x per week. This all lasted all of about a month. Then - I stopped exercising gradually though I was still logging. Then eventually I stopped logging entirely.

The interesting things about it all is, just like Shyla It all kind of "stopped" RIGHT AS I HIT 200lbs. (Down from 210). I remember being SO excited when I stepped on the scale thinking - wow I am almost there I am almost out of the 200's! But then I stopped? Why? I would think that if anything that should motivate me to keep going but it did the exact opposite.

I had even been blogging on CK, but I stopped that as well because I didn't want any of my "friends" there to know how badly I had failed and just quit. Sometimes I didn't want a response or advice - I just wanted to blog and talk it out. I'm sure you know what I mean heh. So I don't know. I think I'm ready to give it another shot. But - not hit it so intensely this time. I think it was just TOO MUCh all at once for me. I really want to make life long changes and counting calories wasn't as hard as I thought it would be. In fact the things I was learning were really helping me make better decisions.

Anyway, I'm rambling now but I had to comment because I think this is an extremely important topic to weight loss. I really need to get my head in the game and just do this. I'm back to feeling like crap with no energy - like before - and I hate it!

WeightlossBattleBlog said...

This article was very helpful and I really like how you didn't get down on depressed people.

Sometimes people really get down on depression, because they don't understand it.

I've just started getting a serious health problem under control. I battled it for six years and it left me a wreck mentally and emotionally. Now that I have been getting treatment since February I feel a little better. I hope that a year from now I'll feel like myself again.

I do feel good enough though to try and attack my weight problem.

Thanks for being compassionate and caring and not overly judgmental like some peope can be about depression.

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Claudia said...

I agree, a leopard can change its spots. Believing really is the most important part of any endeavour.

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