Saturday, September 30, 2006

Saturday's Weigh-in = 145.50!!!

Looks like I am doing a good job of being healthy without constant monitoring! I gained some weight during the stressful user's group meeting, Last Sunday I was up to 149.50!!! UGM was nearly "Maui Bad" to my weight loss... but last years UGM was just a bad too... So I guess UGM is like a Four day extra Stressful Holiday! :) I should plan for it in the future. But anyway, I am finally getting back to "normal" again!!

I've been so lonely today. Aaron is away this weekend to a "3-Day Gaming/Bachelor Party." (He left Friday night at 5.) And this morning's Tai Chi class was canceled or something, because no one was there. :(

The only human interaction I had today was with Millie. She's a little old lady who lives down the hall and stops by about once a week to have me balance her checkbook. She likes to talk my ears off, but it's slightly annoying since she can't hear AT ALL so she yells all the time. And I have to shout into her ear and use lots of hand guestures in order to respond. It can be frustrating. She always gives me cookies too. Most time I take them, thank her then throw them away once we're apart. But today she had Animal Crackers!!! I love animal crackers! So I had them! ;)

IN OTHER NEWS
I was recently contacted by wltips.com. This website features the stories of lots of sucessful dieters, and my story is now up too! It is fun to read how each person did it their way! Maybe someone there has advice that is "more your style." It's something cool to checkout!

I think I am going to go take a nap. :)

Cheers!

Jess

Thursday, September 28, 2006

So far so good! I think...

These last few days have been so strange.

It feels weird not writing everything eat in my food journal. It feels abnormal not taking my weight after feeding the cats. But, I feel good and healthy! I get up and exercise as before, and I have been able to listen to the needs of my body better!

I asked Aaron what day of the week I should take my weight. He suggested I could try weighing myself daily, and then average the weights each week. That would help "smooth" out daily weight fluctuation... but then I am back to weighing myself daily again! I don't think that will work, so I'll take my chances just stepping on the scale on Saturdays. ;)

I'll let you know how Saturday goes!

Jess

Latest Picture:
Jessica's Before and Now shot

Monday, September 25, 2006

Sinking or Swimming?

Every morning the cats and I have a ritual. I stumble over them from the bed to the bathroom, then I stumble over them from the bathroom to the kitchen. In the Kitchen I open them a fresh can of cat food to share.

Our Cats: Sabina (top-left) and Maxima (bottom-right)

The cat food is a diversionary tactic so I can double-back to the scale! You see, without the food to distract them, the cats always climb on the scale with me! (“ACK!! How did I gain 10 pounds overnight!!!! Oh, wait... Hi Sabina. Yes, I'll feed you now.” =^-^= MEOW!!! )

But this morning I chose not to get on the scale. (Don’t worry, the cats still got their food!)

I was very tempted to see what I weighed, but I don’t think daily weighing makes much of a difference anymore. I have been hovering around 145-ish for almost a year now, which is within the “healthy weight range” for someone my height.

Taking my weight data daily was really only good for populating my weight loss spreadsheets, but I can easily convert them to weekly weight monitoring spreadsheets by using a simple sorting algorithm, then copying the sorted data to a new sheets!! Oops, sorry... enough with the geek-speak.

I think weekly weigh-ins will help me win back my self-esteem from the daily emotional roller coaster a quarter pound up or down caused. On "light days" I feel great, but on days when I'm puffy or after a night out… I feel bad. And bad days trigger more bad days if you seek food to comfort yourself. It is an all too familiar trap many people trying to lose weight fall victim to.

You'd think after all these years of healthy living, and such a significant weight loss, I'd be able to conquer that vicious cycle... over-all I have, but in the past month or so it's been winning. I've had so much stress and my recent illness kept me from my usual exercise routine. But I've got right back into it as my health improved this week!

Without the daily weigh-in I feel like a kid who's swimming out to the deep end of the pool for the first time without a "floatie." Will I sink or will I swim?

I think I will swim! But if I do start to flounder, I know I have lots of "lifeguards" out there who will jump in and save me.

Trying to live like a real "Non-Dieting Healthy Person!"

Jess

Thursday, September 21, 2006

I'm in a Magazine?! (and still sick)

Yesterday I received an email that said: "I recently saw an article in the October issue of Women's Health & Fitness about different blog sites and yours was featured as one of them." I was like Whoa! Really, I am in a magazine?! I must find a copy of this magazine to check it out! I have not seen a copy of it yet. Hopefully, it will hit the shelves in my area soon. :)

Going to Women's Health & Fitness's website revealed that the October 2006 issues also appears to be the last one the are releasing!!! I hope this doesn't make it more difficult to locate!

If you find the magazine with the article, let me know! (Cover color, page number etc...) :)

I am still sick and so utterly exhausted. I called in sick today. My team lead sounded cranky. After I said I feel horrible and will not be in today he said, "See you tomorrow." in a tone that was like, "You will be in tomorrow, even if you are dead!" So now I am sick, exhausted, and feel guilty that I am sick and unable to be at my desk. I wouldn't get anything accomplished if I was at work though... I am just so out of it. :-P

I have been sick since Saturday. Monday night, I was at the Pre-UGM Launch Party until 9:30, finally asleep by 10:30. I was up again by 5:30, and got all dolled up. I was downtown by 7:15 AM to greet arrivals to our General Session. (Still Sick) After the Session I helped direct users walking from Overture Hall to the Monona Terrace. After lunch I attended some learning session. I then hurried home, and got into costume for the "Future Feast"

I was a greeter at the Future Feast from 6:00 - 9:30. I was covered in glitter, so I had to take a shower when I got home. I finally got most of it off and crawled into bed at 11. (Still sick and now exhausted.)

Wednesday I get up early again because I have to be a room monitor from 7:15 - 12:15 in "Ballroom A" in the Monona Terrace. I had to stand that whole time, and I never had a chance to get away for a drink of water, or more importantly, Orange Juice. So I basically stood and dehydrated for 5 hours. I handed out packets of power-point slides, and collected evaluations.
(while still sick)

Wednesday evening things continued. At 5:30 I went to Ballroom C to help Host about 60 attendees for a night out on the town. Two other guys from Epic were also along as hosts, but I took on a leadership role, marking off who had arrived, handling the check, etc...

We were doing the "Space Place" activity. Here is what the brochure said it was:

"The vastness of sidereal space are opened to us, as we stargaze through the telescopes of University of Wisconsin, one of the builders of the Hubble space telescope. Learn about astronomical advancements and the future of space research and development. Includes private rooftop stargazing with dinner at the restaurant Magnus, featuring South American cuisine and fresh Hawaiian seafood flown in daily."

First the food.

There was no "South American Cuisine" or "Hawaiian seafood." We had our choice of Steak, Farm-raised Salmon, Duck, or Carrot Gnocchi. (with soup or salad). The food was very tasty but, some people were disappointed, thinking they were getting "Fresh Hawaiian Seafood."

Leaving the restaurant was a bit difficult because anyone that ordered alcohol had to pay for it themselves. so we had like 30 people trying to have the credit card run, make change, etc...

So, now we are about 30 minutes late getting to the "UW SPACE PLACE." And to some, it was another let down. They though they were going to a planetarium, or a "really big telescope."

The "Space Place" is actually an outreach of the UW located in a strip mall on South Park Street. (2300 S. Park, Madison, WI) Dr. Jim Lattis from the University of Wisconsin then gave us a talk about Astronomy and the future of Astronomy.

Now we have a room full of sleepy and slightly buzzed adults that are not really in the mood for another lecture. (They had just spent the last 8+ hours in Health Care lectures at UGM) So they were a bit restless. After Dr. Lattis's presentation a group got to head up to look through the telescope, the others went into the next room to look at the cool space place stuff.

Then there were others that felt mislead and wanted to just go back to their hotel, so we had the shuttle take those who wanted to go back while the rest looked around. Me and the guys ran damage control on those who were upset, and tried not to lose track of those who were really into it and would get lost in the place!!! It was really like herding cats, trying to keep a group like that together. At 10 we finally got the rest of the group done, and back on the coach. We also called some cabs for the other attendees.

We were busy until 10:30 making sure everyone had a ride back to their hotel. When I finally got home I just collapsed.

Today I got up around 8 I felt like I had been run over. My sinuses hurt so bad it just made my eyes ooze. I called in and felt bad that I was sick... but my body needs to heal and recover. In fact, I think am going to go lay back down and drink lots of fluids.

Jess

UGM Events + Cold = 147.50

Monday, September 18, 2006

In Sickness and in Health

This week is the super busy Users Group Meeting (UGM) at work. I have to go "mingle" at a pre-UGM party tonight from 6 - 9PM, then I'm greeting users starting at 7:30 tomorrow morning downtown for the General Session. I will then spend the remainder of the day in more specific sessions. Tomorrow night I will be in costume for the "Future Feast" from 6 - 9 again. Wednesday I will be a room monitor starting at 7:30 to Noon. I do not have any session Wednesday afternoon, however Wednesday evening I am hostessing the "Space Place" event from 6 - 9 again. BUSY BUSY BUSY!!! SO what a perfect time to get a cold!

I started coming down with this cold Saturday, but I kept thinking, oh that's just from the Karaoke and the smoky places. (I went out Friday night.) Sunday I knew I was actually sick so I spent most of yesterday in bed.

Aaron was such a sweety nursing me back to health. He gave me a big glass of orange juice. I here I am, al tucked in and sick in bed, red-chapped nose from all the blowing, and I say: "Orange Juice has over 100 calories per cup!" He says. "I don't care. We can worry about getting you healthy once you are actually healthy."

He's so smart!! And he makes a great point! I'll worry about getting healthy once I am actually healthy again! Orange juice it is! ;)

Cheers!

Jess

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Ribs and Rolls

I think the question I get asked about the most is: Do you have "loose skin?"

Most people think that after shedding half your weight your going to have some leftover skin.

But I've lost my weight   V E R Y     S L O W L Y   over a long time, so my skin has been able to stick pretty close to my new shape!

You see, skin is an organ, a living part of your body, and not a stretched out balloon stuck on our outsides. Over time skin can shrink to your new shape, depending on your age and its elasticity. ( I am 28.5 by the way.)

Pinch the skin on the back of your hand, that is all the thicker your skin is. In order for the skin to shrink there has to be no fat left behind it.

Think of it like an igloo melting from the inside. The ice on the outside will hold it's shape until all the ice from the inside is gone, then it finally collapses.

Our bodies are a lot like that. Once the fat cells are all gone behind the skin, your skin shrinks to the new shape. This takes a long time, and is not easy to do, so most people prefer to take the quick route with plastic surgery to tidy things up.

Here's what my stomach currently looks like. (I hope it's not too traumatizing for ya!) ;) The top is all ribs now, while the bottom still has the remnants of my old rolls. I am still working hard to get these last strongholds of fat off my body by changing my body's composition through strength training. I think it's working! :)

Still working hard to get healthier!

Jess

p.s. the period weight is going away and I was back to 144.75 today.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Just get over it!

The evils of the menstrual cycle have me puffed up to 147!!! That’s nearly 4 pounds of monthly bloat, but that isn't unusual for me. That's average actually. I know that this spike in my weight is temporary… but it's effecting me. I should not be upset, but I am. Every Month it is the same thing. I know this weight is suddenly going to disappear in a few days, but it’s so hard to look on the bright side of things when you feel all puffy, crampy, and miserable! ARGH! :-P

Something that did make me feel good today though was voting in the primary! I can't wait to do it again in November!!!

Saturday, September 9, 2006

Not again...

Last night I displayed tell-tale signs that the monthly mega-bitch has returned.

I don't remember my PMS being so bad when I was bigger. Maybe since I am smaller now it's more concentrated? I don't know.

It was so frustrating because I KNEW I was PMS-ing! The rational part of me said "Why are you getting so upset? These things never bothered you before. It's PMS." My overpowering emotional side however told her, "Get lost!! I'll feel how I want to feel!!!" *SIGH* It's like I'm a passenger in a psycho roller coaster that I have no control over, but after a good nights sleep I think it might be safe for Aaron to talk to me again. ;)

Even though it's close to "that time of the month," my weight has been amazingly stable! This is extra cool considering how unstable I've felt recently! ;) I was 143.25 this morning! That's 1.25 pounds down since September 1st. It's also one pound more than the weight I was when I kicked the fake sugar habit and entered "Maintenance Mode."

I've been keeping up with my exercise and eat around 2000 calories each day now. Oh! And I've finally got a multivitamin again! My old one contained aspartame!!! (Those bastards.) I got a "women's formula" so hopefully it will help "balance me out" by next month!! ;)

I need to have breakfast and get ready for TaiChi! :-D

-Jess

Monday, September 4, 2006

"Backseat Dieting"

I was 144.00 this morning! That's half a pound less than what I was on Friday. :) I made it through a 3-day Weekend and a family gathering successfully!

It was the FIRST time in 6 years of marriage that I finally got to meet members of my husband's family other than his parents and siblings. It was so exciting! There was nearly 20 of us at the party. We played, talked, and took a rides through the woods on their land. They also picked up 5 or 6 different flavors of coffeecake for the special occasion. I tried a small slice of the chocolate chip flavor, then came back to try a slice of the strawberry cheesecake flavor.

When I got the cake someone commented that they've been reading my blog, and how I've recently gained weight. They then suggested I have an apple "or would I just take the cake and confess my sins on my blog again?"

I felt like I had been slapped in the face. These past few weeks have been really rough for me, and the last thing I need is a "backseat dieter" needling me with guilt about it. I don't think they realized how harsh those comments sound to a person who's struggled with her weight. For those of you that don't know "fat-ese" this is what I heard: "I read your blog. You're getting fat. Fatties like you shouldn't be eating cake."

I wouldn't have taken the cake if it wasn't within my calorie limits. I have been losing weight, and getting healthy for over 4 years now. I think I know what works for me! ;) I've never stopped eating sweets, so don't be surprised if you see me eating cake. I eat cake. I eat pie. I eat ice cream. I eat whatever I want, and I'm still successful! I don't need criticism on what I eat, especially at a party.

I ate 2020 calories today. (Maintenance Level) I rode the bike, hard, for 30 minutes this morning before breakfast. Later on, I did another 20 minutes as a warm-up for weight lifting & sit-ups. I think tomorrow will be a Rest Day! ;)

Cheers!

Jess

Friday, September 1, 2006

Only Slightly Disastrous

I was 144.50 this morning, which is 3.75 pounds more than 140.75 I was on August 1st. Then PMS puffed me up to 141.00. A few days later cravings and bloating increased my weight to 142.25. Right at the end of my period my Uncle died and I went straight into a few days of grief eating tipping the scales up to 144.25. If that wasn’t enough, our friends from San Francisco visited for a few days, and we went out for every meal. Thai Food for Lunch, then Sushi for supper. The next day we had Donuts for breakfast and lots of pizza for lunch… after all that I was 147.50(!!!), but it was very temporary. (Most of that weight was just from all the food still in me! ;)

I will be back to my usual 140-145 ish weight in a few days. I am still in “maintenance mode” until October. (As I “detoxify” from the aspartame.)