Wednesday, August 9, 2006

My Message

So last night I had time to really check out that show’s website.

It seems they’ve contacted me about the show topic: “I dropped pounds, and my Lover/Friends/Family Dropped Me!” Mmm, I don’t think I meet that criteria. No one has “dropped” me because I’ve lost weight.

I recently wrote about how Aaron and I are just as lovey-dovey as ever! One of my friends sometimes makes snarky comments about my new size, but we haven’t ended our friendship over it. And my family is very proud of me... although, my Mom is ALWAYS trying to get me to eat! It is so complicated with Mom for a number of reasons:

  1. She seems to think that “Food is Love.” If you eat the food she makes, then you love her. When I say “No thanks,” it really seems to upset her.
  2. The bad eating habits mom taught me as a child are what made me obese to begin with!

  3. My little sister, Samantha, is being raised the same way. She will turn 8 in September, yet already weighs 125 pounds!!! That’s less than 15 pounds away from what I currently weigh! It really upsets me that she’s raising another daughter who will have to deal with the psychological trauma of being “The FAT KID.” I’ve talked to mom about my concern for Sammy, but I feel so powerless to help the ones closest to me with their weight and food struggles.
  4. Mom used to be big like me, but got bariatric bypass surgery in Feb. 2004. She got skinny fast, but never learned how to be healthy. Now she’s freaking out because she is starting to regain weight. She has asked for my help, and I give it to her… but I don’t know if she can change. I can’t make her be healthy… she needs to learn to do that herself.
  5. I also think she is upset that I weigh less than her now, and I didn’t have to reroute my digestive track to do so!
Okay, so maybe there is a bit of tension between me and my mom, but it’s not bad. She hasn’t “dropped me.” She just keeps trying to feed me!

*SIGH* I was so excited, thinking that I’d get to share my weight loss success story on T.V.... But I don’t think I have enough “relationship baggage” for them to want me. Oh well, I didn’t need those “10 extra pounds” the camera adds anyway! ;)

If I ever get on television, I want to tell people they don’t have to starve, or get cut apart, to lose what may seem like an impossible amount of weight. I want to inspire people to know that massive weight loss is achievable naturally if you are truly dedicated to getting healthy!!!

It’s not about getting skinny, being a size X, or weighing a certain number. You just have to focus on what is good for you, and really work at it! It’s not easy, and it takes a long time, but it is doable! You don’t have to be perfect; you just need to be dedicated!!!

As long as you keep working towards being healthy, even if you have bad days along the way, you will eventually get healthy!!! That is my message, simple but true. It just something this instant-gratification world doesn’t want you to hear. They’d rather take our money, encouraging us to over-consume, then take even more of our money offering us drugs and miracle products to “restore our health.” This culture is criminal.


Anonymous said...

Hi Jessica, I have been a dedicated reader of your site since last October. Since than I have watched you drop the pounds and I am very proud of the hard work that you have done. I have tried so hard to lose weight and have been unsuccessful. Atleast until now...I have just joined weight watchers and it is teaching me how to eat and I love it. But what I wanted to say to you is about your daughter is your sisters age and only weights 50 lbs. My daughter will turn 8 on August 25 so they arent that far apart in age and frankly your sisters weight has concerned me. Does your mom know that feeding your sister the way she does is putting her at risk for diabetes and I hate to say it but even heart disease? And that is not fair to your sister who has no control over what is being fed to her. I do hope that you keep talking to your mom and what she is doing to your sister and I will pray that she will see the error that she is making. Your sister deserves to have a normal life. She doesnt have to go through life as the "fat kid" and than get to be an adult and worry about her weight. I'm sorry to have gone on and on but I just dont like to see a child being robbed of her childhood. Thanks for listening!


Jess said...

I couldn't agree more, Tammy!

Here is a copy of the original e-mail I sent my mom about this topic.

Samantha had spent the night at our house and we returned her to Mom.

Date: 07-05-2006

Mom –

Please stop my sister from killing herself.

When we brought Samantha back this weekend, I couldn’t help but notice that she instantly started eating Oreo after Oreo, right from the bag, without control or oversight. Then when you returned with the pizza and salad, she had 2 bowls of salad, at least 4 big slices of cheese pizza, and then went back to eating the Oreos!!!

I had a salad, 2 slices of pizza, and no cookies.

Sam ate double what I did, on all accounts – plus the cookies!

I wanted to say something then, but I didn’t know how to do it front of Donnie. (That's her new boyfriend.)

Sam seems to think that eating is a contest, and that eating a lot quickly is “Good.”

But, she didn’t eat like that when she was with us. She kept busy playing games and watching movies…

Then she wanted to play with my scale because “it’s like the one at the doctor’s.” I showed her how to move the counterweights to balance the scale, and she weighed 125!

She isn’t even 8 years old, and she’s less than 15 pounds away from my weight!

Samantha needs serious help!!!! If something is not done soon, she will have type II diabetes before high school, and a host of other medical problems her whole life!

She seems to just eat because she has nothing else to do…

She may get upset with you, and she may cry, but she needs to learn that food isn’t entertainment, a punishment or a reward.

This has to be handled correctly so she doesn’t end up with even more distorted ideas about eating.

There are lots of resources out there for helping obese children live healthier lives. You can help her learn good food habits that will protect her when she is away from you too. (Like when she is at her Dad's.)

Please, as another one of your children raised on McDonald’s food and Hostess Day-Old Bakery Products… Don’t make another one of your kids suffer as “the fat kid.”

It totally sucks, and I see myself in Samantha.

You are her mother, and you can do something about it. Get Donnie involved too, and change all your lives for the better.

I can’t be silent about this anymore.

Jess Scott

TammyM27 said...

Hi Jessica, I am glad to see that you have taken an interest in your sisters well being. I just hope that your mom can do the same. I know that your life and your sisters life is none of my business but I have to say that if your mom dont change maybe you can have your sister spend more time over at your house so she can learn more about good eating and exercise. Its just a thought. I have spent so much time reading about you and how you have changed your life and I feel like I know you. Again I dont like to see children robbed of their childhood. Hope all goes well! Take care!


LC in Sunny So Cal said...

Jess, you are getting the message out. Maybe not to an international TV audience, but the word IS spreading.

Thank you for reaching out. Children like your sister (and us, when we were kids) don't eat that way if they're not in some emotional pain.

My dd is now 11, and she has always been taught to eat to fuel her body, and so far she's a healthy weight, and has a pretty good perspective on food, my problems notwithstanding.

I've been open with her about my desires now to start eating well (I hid my eating from her, but my weight is here for her to observe, obviously!) and she's been supportive, and hasn't started the "I'm fat" stuff that so many of her peers have. (At least not openly, to me...and I think we have a pretty open dialoge.)

Keep living an exemplary life, and be the best example for her you can...that's probably your best way to affect her.

Hugs...I know the pain of not being able to change someone else, and I am no longer eating over that pain! Yay us!